The Disney Awards

Sorry for temporarily disappearing!  I had planned on having plenty of time to write a post last weekend, but my mom and I ended up traveling to my cousin’s house for an impromptu family gathering after the birth of his third child (a girl!).  Since then I’ve been caught up in midterm exams, summer job hunting, and applying for student financial aid.  Anyway….

Animated (Disney) Films:

I know animation week is technically over, but in honor of last weekend’s Academy Awards, I decided it would only be right to hand out some completely random awards to some of my favorite Disney movies.  The winners are:

Creepiest Disney Character – Monsieur d’Arque (Beauty and the Beast)

Everyone remembers Gaston as the true villain of Beauty and the Beast, but the asylum owner is essentially the guy that I always expect to find lurking in some shadowy corner of a public parking garage late at night.  Who honestly thought it was a good idea to put this guy in charge of people with mental disorders?

Best Sing-Along Song – “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” (Mulan)

To quote Millie’s post, Mulan is pretty “bad ass,” and so is one of her movie’s signature tunes.  I firmly believe that passionately lip-syncing this song can turn any mundane task into an epic adventure.  Needless to say, it’s my go-to song when I have to wash dishes - if that opening line of “Let’s get down to business” doesn’t get me motivated, nothing will.

Coolest Talking Dog – Dodger (Oliver and Company)

Disney might infamous for its multitude of talking dog movies, but no other dogs are quite like Dodger.  I mean, he plays piano with his tail, spends an entire musical number bragging about his “street savoir faire,” and cannot manage to walk without strutting.  Dodger may not be the cutest or the most likeable, but he’s definitely the coolest.  He even has the sunglasses to prove it.


 Best Alcohol-Induced Musical Number– Pink Elephants on Parade (Dumbo)           
While I never really liked the film Dumbo, I loved this part of the movie as young child.  It wasn’t until I got older that I realized the whole scene was made up of Dumbo’s drunken hallucinations.  Weird.

Best Disney Sequels – Toy Story 2 and 3
None of the other Disney sequels made me weep like a baby in a crowded movie theater.

Best Disney Pop Star – Powerline (A Goofy Movie)

A Goofy Movie may not be as well-remembered as Disney’s other animated film of 1995 – Pocahontas – but this spin-off of the Saturday morning cartoon Goof Troop was marked by the only appearance of fictional music sensation Powerline.  Sporting a futuristic jumpsuit and a lightning bolt hairdo, this cartoon dog (what a surprise) possessed all the best qualities of both Prince and Michael Jackson.  If only he sang more than two songs…

Most Awesome Name – Mufasa (The Lion King)

Would it be weird to name one of my future children after an animated lion?

Greatest Unintentional Poet – Pocahontas

 Pocahontas is the only Disney heroine to communicate almost entirely through environmental metaphors.  She’s like a literature professor’s dream come true.

Animation/Live-Action Combo – Mary Poppins  
                           
Despite that this film only contains a few animated scenes, I felt that my fond memories of Bert the chimneysweep dancing alongside animated penguins in his self-created chalk world justified its inclusion in this post.  While my older brother would disown me if he knew I was giving this fake award to anything other than “Who Framed Roger Rabbit?,” Mary Poppins was my first favorite movie.  At age 3, when all my friends were dressing up as witches and princesses for Halloween, I apparently wanted nothing more than to dress up as the ultimate magical nanny, so my mother outfitted me with exact matches of Mary’s dress, hat, and parasol.  Best costume ever.


Film that Made Me Question Whether My Father Only Had Children as an Excuse to See More Animated Movies - Chicken Run (Not Disney, but definitely worth a mention)

The premise: A group of chickens must learn how to fly in order to escape their inevitable death at the hands of the owner of a pot pie factory.  I still love this movie and find it hilarious, but my Dad’s love for this flick has always far out-weighed my own.  Which makes me wonder…


 And that concludes my awards ceremony.  I’ve loved reading all of the recent posts; they’ve been making me overly nostalgic and desperate to get my hands on some of my old VHS tapes.

Favorite book post coming later this week, I swear!

P.S. Just realized that I forgot to mention both Aladdin and Tarzan.  They’re pretty great too.